Death is rarely something I choose to discuss…well for a few obvious reasons and a few that I’m never quite ready to touch on. But after the week I’ve had, I couldn’t let it end without mentioning that Morgan’s father and I had to put our dog down. For any pet owner…it’s your worst fear realized because though you know that nothing can last forever…you never want to lose something you’ve loved and come to care for so deeply. Having a pet can teach us so many things like responsibility, patience, kindness, playfulness and, most importantly, unconditional love. When the time comes….their can be this feeling of immense pain and heartbreak or for some…nothing at all and I understand each stance. My emotions are little all over the place.
I’ve always had a ridiculous obsession with dogs. I adore them. My parents got me my first dog at 4 years old and she lived well into my days at college. So since I was originally supposed to be living on campus (obviously pets aren’t allowed) my dog Sissy Mae had to stay behind in DC. So…when Morgan’s Father and I started dating…and eventually moved in together…I begged for a dog. At the time, I was volunteering for ASPCA and I was seeing them everyday so my anxiousness for wanting one was growing. I eventually did enough convincing that he agreed. I was working one day and found out we got 3 new small dogs in and one happened to be name Regis. He was a blondish brown color and small but really spunky. So…made the appointment to visit with him…and another dog that had just arrived but out of the two….I adored him from jump. Now Morgan’s Father wasn’t too thrilled with him (just thought he was to young and all over the place) but agreed and we officially adopted (ADOPTING IS REALLY IMPORTANT…BREEDING BUYING IS BAD) him in June of 2006. We hated that name Regis and he didn’t even look like it was his name…so I (all on my own without discussing it) named him “Teddy Graham”.
We did so much with him and he became my true companion. He went on a million car rides, cozied up to me while I was sick and heartbroken, was extremely friendly to everyone who came to visit, etc. When we moved from NC back to DC, he adapted here immediately and took well to my mom’s dog, Izzy (R.I.P.). I eventually wanted another dog and we got Shug Avery and so we at one point had 3 dogs. Teddy was always just really chill. When I got pregnant with Morgan…I kinda think he knew. Because when I had her early and then eventually bought her home…he adored her. While Shug and Izzy weren’t really into her…Teddy slept in her room and shifted from being my dog…to Morgan’s. Morgan is entirely too young to know about death or loss of a pet and honestly, I don’t even know that she knew or cared half the time that he was even in her room but for me it was just a comfort…knowing he was in there protecting her.
I’m sad he’s gone but at the same time…I believe we gave him the best life. He was about 13 years old and his health was just deteriorating. It was the humane and right thing to do because we loved him and didn’t want him suffering.
One thing I do know…When I’m ready for another dog and Morgan is old enough to appreciate what it takes to have a pet…It’ll be another awesome addition and I look forward to it.
No Gloom…Just Peace,